4-11-03  Don’t Need To Be A Citizen© by Nat Christian

Good news…

The government says that you only need to be a citizen in order to vote in this country, but you certainly don’t have to be a citizen to die for this country.

“Oh, no, we don’t require you to be a citizen… Please, be our guest, go right ahead and risk your life, but don’t you dare vote for the presidency, for the person who can decide to send you off to die.”  But please, no really, feel free to die.

Nevertheless, they will hand out “honorary citizenships” to those innocent non-citizen young soldiers who died in battle, heroically doing what they believed to be good.  At least that was what they were told… “To disarm a regime with weapons of mass destruction, because they presented a clear and present danger.”

Right, the regime’s baking soda and vinegar propelled aircraft were going to fly… sputter, sputter, ploink, plink, goink…  over many countries, over the ocean, to Iowa and drop their weapon of mass destruction, while we watched and said… “They’re here.”   Their military couldn’t even afford combat boots.

Lets get this out of the way – I think Sadaam is/was/is a despicable, selfish, ruthless dictator (and that double-Adolf mustache thing was starting to bug me – It was almost worth getting him juat for that).  Now, I’d like to move on.

So we now give our posthumously newly citizened heroes a memorial (along with the other deceased young soldiers), with words spoken by a man of God, in a military uniform, of course.  “The chaplain, Lieutenant Colonel So-and-So, speaks words of  “comfort.”

And our citizens’ loved ones cry.  And the other country’s citizens have died, and their loved ones cry.  We showed our own and we showed them.  Yes we did (Remember those guys who kicked ass in school?).  We needed to show someone who’s ass we knew we could kick, that we were mightier.  Great, by the way, did the Lakers win last night?

Got a question. I KNOOOOOW some don’t want to hear it, but like my injured buddy in Dirty Harry said:

“I Gotsta know.”

Q: What about the Weapons of Mass Destruction?

A: Oh, no, we were going in to “liberate” the people.

Q: What happened to the Weapons of Mass Destruction?

A: You don’t get it!  We went in to liberate the people!

Q: Weapons of Mass Destruction!?

A: Didn’t you see them taking down Sadaam’s statue?  We liberated the people!  L i b e r a t  i o n…

what’s the matter with you!!?

Q: But you told all of those, and the families of those, that went into battle that there were Weapons of

Mass Destruction that posed an imminent danger.  You told them that.

A: Didn’t you see them taking down Sadaam’s statue!?

Q: You’re not listening. You told all of those, and the families of those, that went into battle that there

were Weapons of Mass Destruction that posed an imminent danger.  You told them that.   Maybe

their families would have objected if you told them it was about liberation.

A: It doesn’t matter now. We liberated the people.  Why be so analytical?  We liberated the people!

Okay, so now that we’ve done the liberation shtick, is it all over now?  The job is done, right?